Tuesday, March 30, 2010

teman sekampung


bayangkan, anda mencintai seseorang, yang telah berpunya. bukannya dah kawin pun. cuma, mereka ada buat janji untuk bersama. hanya kerana mereka telah dibesarkan bersama di kampung halaman yang sama, bersekolah di tempat yang sama, serta yang lainnya.
jadi ini untuk anda semua, yang kepingin akan orang lain punya.

Puspawangi from Kodiang Village

At first a gaze,
a phase
that can't be phrased.

but then a smile,
for just a while,
all gone, the vile.

but with stories thick as crust,
crashing all these vast lust
into specks of dust.

how absurd,
as the past feelings can't be turned,
into something never been heard.

why can't those past stories
and memories
be erased like the melodies
that I'd written though they're bliss?

in this pain
I'm acting a mere vain
to walk in this lane

I'll stop acting like a thief,
and leave,
if you believe
that you're destined to live
with him.

my heart is dry
with no rain from the sky
thus I cry
along with a heavy sigh.

I shall never accept
the mere concept
in which you had adapt to.
because you know
that I love you.


indah sungguh Malaysia

Friday, March 26, 2010

perut tengah lapar

tq, thats all. enjoy.

Thursday, March 25, 2010

hatred written. (part 2)

CAUTION: some words used are explicit and parenteral advisory may be required. but don't worry and fear not, as the words are written in white, and unless you want to read them, you may highlight it yourself. but actually, there are none anyway.

part 2 - because you raped my girlfriend

*dark room*
*a few light from distance away, slips into the ventilation fan*
*rats circles around the room, making noises while chewing a lefted garbage*
*in the middle, lies a bed, and a man, called hanif roslan*

hanif groans in pain, his eyes were opened, but he can't move. he realize that his feet was tied to the bed.
upon his early conciousness, he asked himself, "what happened?"
"my god, why am i here, what is this place?!"

he tried to remember the last thing that happened to him. and he remembered.
he was at a mamak restaurant alone to watch a late football match. after the game, he got to his motorcycle, starts the engine, and cycles home. but then, something from a distance flew towards him, a huge vase, probably, thrown by someone in the dark. he immediately collapse and screetch himself with his bike 40 meters away.

"i remember now!" he said.
while holding the enourmous pain he is having, he tried to move, but failed. because his left leg was wasted, and his right leg is tied to the bed. his left elbow joint was also wasted, but he can still move the fingers, but than would only make him cries tears of blood.

but that is not all, as after a while his pupil dilates even more, and he could see better and clearer, he came to an absolute shock. both of his testicles are taken out from his scrotum. he moarns loudly in pain. he tried to hold his testicles and to put it back into his scrotum, but to touch them, was a pain that couldn't be described by words. only his facial tears and wrinkles in a complex form could means it.

and breaking the silence, a television by the corner of the room. the image was badly distorted, a face in white mask appears.

"welcome to your own doom, this may be the place where you would end your miserable life and maybe if you survive you're going to continue your life in a less joissance way. so now we are going to play a game. you already noticed that your testicles were removed, but they're still innocently attached to your body by the semineferous tubules and your blood vessels. in other words, your testicles is still a living part of your body. but bare in mind that any sudden movement you make would seriously injure them and if it is serious enough, they, would, snap.

roslan is crying freakkingly hard now. he can't even focus himself to listen to what the man in white mask said to him.

the white masked man continues, "now that you have your dignity hanging off from your soul, i suggest you listen carefully. by the corner of the room, there's a needle and a surgery thread than u can use to sow back your testicles back into your functionless scrotum.
the idea is that you must be quick, as in 6 minutes or less, your piece of cremaster muscle would be wasted, and your imbecile life would totally perish."

"good luck"

Monday, March 22, 2010

hatred written. (part 1)

CAUTION: some words used are explicit and parenteral advisory may be required. but don't worry and fear not, as the words are written in white, and unless you want to read them, you may highlight it yourself. this is not a regular poem with good rhythm and a wise use of words. in fact, its not a poem at all, but they are hatred, written on a piece of blog post. but i had change all the explicit words into something cheerful, so no worrries. =)

Part 1- She came to tell me that you 'coloured' her.

she comes to me with a bursting tears,
i quickly grab her and wipe her fears,
i wait a moment to take a guess
of what is happening now?

so i hold her head and pat for calmness,
i gulp my saliva in this heroic verse,
and then her cry is even less,
so i ask her would you talk to me now?

she snorted in her big mucous,
but i can still see some more by her nose,
i use my thumb to wipe her eyes,
and say 'hey, look me in the eye'.

i ask her why?, what happened?,
she told me that she had been coloured.

then i say 'what the smore?!'
she said '...' nothing, she cried some more.
burst into anger i ask 'who did this?!'

she tried to answer but her voice is stuck.
she cough a little and begin to talk.

and she said 'hanif roslan..'
i said barn that hanif roslan,
isn't he the one from Kelantan?
she said no not that hanif roslan,
this hanif roslan just came back from afghanistan.

i said 'what the truck?! that man?!'
'isn't he your cycling ex-boyfriend?'
'how dwell he come and colour my girlfriend'
'owh flower dandelions that lily ash hole'

i asked her how did this happen?
she said he just grab her and let it happen.

i said thats all nonsense.
she said i cant do anything but to be innocent. (what?)
why cant you fight back, why are you so desend?

she said that he's too strong,
and he got chlorofoam,
i'm not a man from bandung,
and he is not from rome,

i kinda have lost my rhyme,
but there is no more time,

i had postpone the post a while,
can't take no more hostile.

i let her go from my hug,
and said i'm freakking gonna kill that thug,
get his tentacles out of his score rythm,
and feels his own insolence from my mayhem.

she said just let it go away
you cant do anything anyway.

whilst her speak made me flared up high,
i think im gonna kill that guy,
how dare he touch my girl's thigh, (n much else)
i burst into anger that i cant deny,
my heart is condensed and its so lily dry,
i know you're just going to hue and cry,
and i cant just let this guy go and fly,
because now that he broke the rules implied,
i'm going to smash that jerk like a fly!
so i say to my honey pie,
hey my dear, goodbye.
i'm off to Brunei.

part 2 will continue on thursday

Sunday, March 21, 2010

skrip spontan


wah, hari ini punya kuat lagi pembikinan menara nafsu oleh syaitan durjana. baru sahaja jiwa meronta menahan kemahuan yang membawa kepada lembah penzinaan, mereka menyalakan api di atas celupan belerang yang bakal meletus pada bila-bila masa.

ambil jari mu itu, masukkan ke dalam mulutmu, kuncup sedikit, lalu cucuhkanlah ia dengan yakin ke atas api kecil yang menyala itu. walau kau sangka ia kecil tak membinasa, takkan kau hendak tunggu pula apabila belerang yang hitam tiada maya itu menghasilkan kuasa.

hanya sedikit lagi, katanya itu didengari oleh hatinya sendiri sahaja. tatkala sang pujangga yang diraung itu perlakuannya hanyalah yang Esa maha Mengetahui arif tentang perkitaran hariannya. jasad yang melutut itu hanya mampu berdoa untuk yang terbaik. sungguh, si pujangganya itu jua yang disebut-sebut seperti zikir.

mungkin, muda lagi. bisiknya tidak lagi dihiraukan oleh orang tuanya, maka diri sendiri sajalah yang diharap gantung. walau sebelum ini langkah yang tersilap itu dia boleh tarik balik, tapi kali ini katanya jangan. jangan tarik balik langkah yang telah dibuka. susun. pergi terus. lebih baik.

tatkala fitrah manusia melupai untuk menyelesaikan kemaslahatan hati, aku rasa sudah tiba masanya untuk memulakan langkah yang lain, bukan langkah baru. tetapi terus meluru membuka seribu langkah menghadapi masa hadapan yang tentunya lebih mengundang.

lupakan! lepaskan dia! apa kau tidak percaya ketentuan Allah?

saya yakin. saya telah mengambil langkah ini. sementara orang hanya tahu menarik balik langkahnya, saya kata tidak. kerana kali ini, saya akan terus jalan ke hadapan.

kau tidak payah jalan lagi! kata seorang lain itu. tapi, sudah berapa lama saya perlu duduk dan kemudian berdiri? setiap kali langkah dibuka saya harus menariknya semula? tidak. bukan kali ini. saya akan jalan terus. jumpa kamu di hadapan. Qada' dan Qadar Allah, saya percaya. dan saya usaha.


Friday, March 19, 2010

spontaneous script


sigh, how come that in each and every phase of a lover's desire compliments with something that is called lust, but that is bound and expected to happen because none of the being in the world have the ability to defy the Almighty and so by starting and bounded by nothing, Allah had design us to be in this world.

as so, in a lover's desire there would be jealousy that would be ruining a relationship or worse, a friendship because hearts shouldn't be able to pursue together something that is binded with ego and thus, a massive cold ice screening the surface of faces in which only either one of us would breath under the air we desire.

we should be relieved by choices, that comes and goes each and everytime the world cycles under its orbit and circles too the moon and the sun as how Allah had made it so from the beginning of the skies that is practically is beyond the reach that no one in our own knowing had grasp something so bizarre, and vast.

how come that would be love? while somehow chastity plays its part with the mixing of lustful desire and all the world would know that the north and the south pole attracts, even in being an exact opposite being as how we are created to be, destined to be, and this is for you, my love, i'm holding my anticipation of you.


Sunday, March 14, 2010



Monday, March 8, 2010

revelling in energy that everyone's emitting


the start of a new semester is kinda bored. it hasn't heat up yet.
so i figure that it might be well to do a post right now. yeah, sure. why not?
the part with the light grey fonts can be skipped. its nothing important.

poetry is now with a new font and a new code. -code purple
but with the same taste, its all just a lame poetry from me.
if you're intrested in poetry then go ahead and read it.
if any of these words is new to you don't be so shy to grab a dictionary.
if the phrase is all so damn the effing confusing then go ahead and leave me a question by the comment below.
if my poetry sucks, then just say it. either directly to me, through instant message, comments, or email.
if i said too much if and now my post sounds like richard rudyard kipling's poem, then skip this grey fonts.
if only i would find anyone that would sincerely criticize my writings. that would be great.
if people could understand some of the secrets that i share through my writings, then all my secrets would be exposed.
if only the beloved in my poetry read my poetry, that would be nice. sigh~
btw, if you see anything awkward in my writing, that is what i call appreciating beauty.
artists of all sorts did it.

Quilling under thy aura

Persona is,
what the persona are.
Me shy to thee,
as I'm full of mar.

Nile is now a dark scene,
just as how the night are.
Flowing kindly and humbly,
plus mysterious you are.

Being around thy circumference,
quilling by the means of thy aura.
When your complexion dimmed,
so as my power.

The subjects tries to tell thee,
that we should be together.
In the night of sandy breeze,
clearing clouds shone by our star.

I'm walking around in ease,
passing around your area,
I'm feeling the heavy bliss,
whilst my heart pounds a raging fire.

This sounds like what absurd is,
its awkward, compliment by a vast bizarre.
While being a doctor wannabe,
I'm acting like a fighting soldier.

This world always are in peace,
yet we are lusting on our desire.
With a strong believe that you and me,
happens to be another chasteful lover.

Anwar Azhari
0900 GMT +2


owh yeah. im tagged by hanani akmal.
so here it is.

so, the reason for this wallpaper is simple.
cuz its d picture of me, writing in the middle of nowhere. and that seems kinda cool. or not?
either way, i am so lucky that i didnt get tagged during my brainstorming time cuz then some of u guys @ gurls might see your pic in my wallpaper. and why? because im writing about u guys lah.. dur.. and im not in the mood to tag anyone.

Sunday, March 7, 2010

kasut sang musafir membawa mata melihat dunia!


credits to: Muhammad Anis Rosli, Ahmad Sayuti and Faiz Kader.
also starring Zalikha Ismail Zulkifli

this is the 3rd day of the Luxor-Aswan trip. last night egypt was down to England by 3-1. the cruise now stopped by Kom-Ombo. theres no much bizarre thing for me as im in no intrest of stony sculptures by the ancient egyptians.

however, there are a few things that i see as an eye opener.

1. Future Exploitation- my mind tickles to think about the tomb itself, where half of it were destroyed. it was badly preserved, there are also huge pillars here that was cut down in half or less. all these coz of why? cuz the stones are used to make a Sugar Factory during the time of Ali pasha. owh my.. Ali Pasha, what a sweet guy.

Muhammad Ali Pasha

some of the pillars which were cut down in half

2. Astronomy- we havnt seen the real thing yet but there's this one Pharaoh's sculptur in which the head part wud only be shone by the sun on the 22nd of February and October. means like they had already knew about all the movements of the sun, moon, stars, and all that from ancient ago.

3. Medicine- they (the archaeologist) actually found inscriptions about the tools of surgery that was used in ancient times and also there were stories of the surgical procedures that was carried out during the ancient era. how cool? next to the sculpture of surgical instruments they are pictures of 2 women. on top which is pregnant and below which is post-partum. hurrmm.. actually theres nothing much but i can totally see in which there are difference in the sculpture of lactating female breast and non-lactating female breast. Go Imhothep..!!

surgical instruments of ancient egypt

top is a picture of a pregnant lady whilst below shows the picture of a lady during puerperium

Imhothep conducted Vasectomy??!!

4. Nudity- why is that in some big sculture the women are totally pictured naked??! thank God, syukur alhamdulillah that our Prophets teaching's told us that the woman shud cover up their aurat and to wear a nice veil. speaking of veil, check out Zalikha. i literally was speechless when i saw her in the lecture hall just now. all i can say is, MasyaAllah.. how nice..

ancient Goddess are pictured nude- shame

5. Rapist- not just the russian singer, the God of ancient egypt is a rapist too.
named Amoun-Meen which pictured as a one hand and one legged man, plus, an erected penis, his story was so totally absured but amazing. during ancient era, by the time of Ramses II, all the men, including young boys are forced to go to war. and then one man, came back from the war (for the reason that i cudnt understand). a few times later, when the men came back from the war, they found out that they're many new children. despite the fact that they had gone to war for a very long time. so they accused that man earlier that went back from the war for raping all the ladies on the country(sounds kinda cool). he was sentenced by the King to be off with his hand and his leg. so, he is a one hand one legged man. after his death, he somehow became a God. moreover, with an erected penis, the symbol of fertility.
LOL. ancient egyptians God. they are much more of them, but i care less. sigh~

Amoun Meen- the God of Fertility
(he got the acknowledgement of being a God by raping@seducing
all the women in the country??)

6. Blogging- the Pharaoh's likes to blog too..!! they carved their stories all over the walls of their temples and houses, LOL..!! thats some ancient blog. thanks to the big stone carved with 3 languages in the British Museum (click the link to learn it yourself) for helping us out with the translation.

ancient blog are written in ancient writings, the Hieroglyphs.

Tuesday, March 2, 2010

off for four


kasut sang musafir akan berkembara lagi.
kali ini ke Luxor dan Aswan.

untuk 4 hari dan 3 malam

doakan kami semua selamat pergi dan balik..!!

senyuman Nazli dan Yadiy